A lesson in vocabulary.

Before I left the states, my dear sweet grandmother (pictured left) imparted on me a bit of wisdom and practical advice. Though, admittedly, it was more of a thinly veiled threat which could be taken as advice. In any event, she said, "You go have fun in England, but if you come back with a fake British accent, I'll pinch your little head off." This is the same grandmother who calls reduced fat sour cream, "half-fast sour cream," (while holding the container out by the tips of two fingers like something smelly you find in the drain) and is a still angry at Crisco for taking the trans-fats out of its vegetable lard because it affects the flakiness of her pie crusts (the rest of us can't tell the difference, but then, she is the expert). After decades of smoking, she's finally given it up, not because it's terrible for her, but because cigarettes have gotten too expensive. The first week after she quit, I asked her how it was going, and she told me that she'd been running up and down the driveway and screaming a lot, but that she'd saved $40! In other words, I absolutely, positively, unequivocally ADORE this woman. She is a southern jewel. And I love how she says my name when she's excited to see me, without the "o" - KAY-line.

So, in part because of Franny's advice (when her first grandchildren were born, she decided that she didn't want to be called "grandma," but that her name, Frances, combined with "granny" would be acceptable, thus, Franny) and in part because it IS pretty silly to come home with a fake accent, I decided early on to steer clear of inflection mimicry, at least the best that I am able. It is actually hard sometimes, and I do catch myself saying certain phrases with a more British twinge. At other times, though, I think my (usually almost undetectable) southern accent comes out more in subconscious defense. However, strangers still identify me as American as soon as I open my mouth, so I must be stickin' to my verbal roots fairly well.

That being said, there are some fabulous sayings and word usages in this country - some of which I have had to ask for clarification as to what they meant or how they were spelled - and many of which I have happily adopted. So, I'm starting a personal dictionary of sorts; including both the words and phrases that I've started saying without meaning to, and the ones that still make me laugh every time I hear them. Some of them, most of us have heard before (think Harry Potter exposure), some I had heard but was surprised to realize are actually in commonplace usage, and some are common words that are just used more frequently or just differently over here. So, without further ado, Caroline's British Dictionary, take 1 (with some help from one rather extensive British "slang" dictionary):

Words:

Chuffed - Adj. Pleased, delighted. Compare with 'dischuffed' and 'chuffed to buggery'. E.g."I'm well chuffed at my stellar exam result." When I first heard this, I thought people were saying "chafed" and I thought it meant they were upset or irritated about something, as in "my legs were quite chafed by horseback riding," or "those tricky exam questions chafed." But after a spelling lesson, I was corrected. And this is not to be confused with the derogatory term Chav - Noun. A person, usually of poorly educated, working class origin, who dresses casually in designer sportswear and vulgar jewellery; generally viewed as an ignorant under-class with a propensity for criminal or loutish behaviour (I've heard the term most often from other students, especially when explaining why the police are always out in large numbers right after Leicester City football matches).

Gutted - Adj. Very disappointed.

Knackered - Adj. 1. Tired, worn out, exhausted. E.g."I missed my bus, I've just walked home, I'm knackered, so I'm going to bed."
2. Broken. E.g."Can we come around to watch TV at yours tonight, our is knackered." 3. Thwarted, prevented from succeeding at a task. E.g."We were knackered after our goalkeeper left mid-season." (Who knew it meant more than just tired!)

Bovvered - Noun. Troubled. A corruption of bothered, derived from cockney pronounciation. As in "I can't be bovvered, I'm not bovvered, Do I look bovvered? Am I bovvered?" and made famous by Catherine Tate's character on the BBC, Lauren Cooper (see video below when Lauren tells the Queen of England that she's "not bovvered"). Admittedly, most people actually say it so it sounds more like 'bothered' and less like 'bovvered,' but it's definitely one of my favorites.


Minted - Adj. 1. Wealthy. E.g."Just because he's minted doesn't mean he's upper-class." 2. Excellent.

Pants - Noun/Adj. Nonsense, rubbish, bad. From the standard British English of pants, meaning underwear; also a variation on 'knickers'. E.g."The first half was pants but I stayed until the end and it was actually a great film." An exclamation of annoyance or frustration. (As in, "That was total pants!" or just "Pants!")

Phrases:

Take the mickey - Vrb phrs. To tease, to ridicule. Also shortened to take the mick. An abbreviated form of the Cockney rhyming slang take the mickey bliss, meaning 'take the piss'. E.g."Stop taking the mickey out of Billy, he's very sensitive and you're upsetting him." Cf. 'take the Michael' and 'extract the Michael'. (Every time I hear this, I think of Harry telling Ron that Hermione didn't reveal her date to the Yuletide Ball because they'd "take the mickey out of her," and I laugh. And I'm a nerd.)

Take the piss - Vrb phrs. 1. To ridicule, to tease, to make fun of. Cf. 'extract the urine'. 2. To take advantage of, to exploit. E.g."Just because they like looking after their grand children, doesn't mean you can dump the kids on them whilst you go out clubbing. That's just taking the piss."

Away with the faeries - (not in the slang dictionary) As far as I can tell, asleep and dreaming, as in "sorry I missed your text, I was away with the faeries and my phone was on silent." (Correction posted on 09 March 2009: According to my classmate Jill, 'away with the faeries' is more along the lines of being not entirely with it, or day-dreaming; "off in la la land," my mother would say. So there we go, clarification.)

Slightly different usages:

Well - Adv. A general intensifier, very, extremely, definitely. E.g."I'm well upset about United losing in the cup."

Quite - This one has the same meaning we're used to, only it's used about 100% more than in the U.S. As in, I might say I'm 'very,' 'really,' 'extremely' or 'so' excited, but in most cases the English would say 'quite excited' for any or all of these. It seems to be their favorite adjective, and I find myself using it a lot more than I once did, as well as using 'very' a lot less.

Well done, you - As in "you did a great job on that."

Good job - As in, "It was a good job you turned in that assignment on time."

Obvious, maybe, or familiar, but funny:

Maths - Math, except here, it's plural!! I love it.
Trainers - Running shoes/sneakers

Washing-up liquid - Dish soap

Footpath - Sidewalk

Fell-walking - Hiking

Mince - Hamburger meat

Trolley - Grocery cart

Chips - Thick, soft french fries

Crisps - Potato chips

Biscuits - Cookies

Rubbish bin, or just 'bin' - Trashcan

Bangers - Sausages

Mash - Mashed potatoes (one famous brand of Instant Mash is called 'Smash Mash' and they have some truly awesome commercials from the 1970's.)


More late additions (thanks Heather):

Lorry - Commercial-sized truck

Lift - Elevator

Car park - Parking lot

Boot - Trunk of a car

And one I forgot that I'm quite fond of:
Naff - Adj. 1. Unfashionable. 2. Rubbishy, useless, of poor quality, unappealing.

It's not that uncommon in the states, but I also really like how much more they use the word Daft - Noun. Silly, foolish.

And, of course, Posh - Adj. Of or belonging to the upper classes (also used to describe nice, expensive, or expensive-looking things, or even an attitude, as in Posh Spice). But I need to stop because I could keep going indefinitely...

And then, there is the phenomenally unique way that the people of Nottingham speak, which I have been receiving lessons in from my dear friends Clare and Darren, to prepare me for when I go visit. It was like a foreign language the first time I heard it...

Nottingham slang:

Ay-up midduck? - Hello and good day sir or madam (Now that I know being called "duck" is part of a normal, friendly greeting, similar to "love", "darlin" or "sweetheart" in the south, I find that I quite like it when a seller at the open market asks me, "How many apples, duck?")

How's it guzzin' ? - How are you doing today?/What's up with you?

Arya reet? - Are you doing alright?

Ee, I'm right nesh me - I am a southerner and therefore have thin blood and a higher susceptibility to cold weather (this one is very accurate and useful for me).

So there we are. Six months worth of British-talk, and I am sure I am still unwise in the ways of the full English vocabulary. I believe it was George Bernard Shaw who so eloquently put it, "England and America are two countries separated by a common language." Too right they are!